So here I sit, at Starbucks, with my iced venti skinny raspberry-vanilla latte, and so I enjoy myself. This is special. And this time is unto the Lord. I have no personalities to share my thoughts with. But I do have so much to work on.
This morning was amazing. Jen and I did worship this morning. Okay, so, as a whole, it could have been better. But, honestly, I have never played on stage quite like I did today. Worthy by Paul Wilbur: It was pretty incredible to me. And the worship with the Word part I thought was so sweet. “See what an incredible love…” with the Romans passage that nothing can seperate us from the love of God. Maybe I am just a romantic when it comes to life. Am I the only one, who considers moments special, who appreciates people, who thinks gifts and talents, and beauty and love, are meaningful? I get so sentimental. I’m not crazy. What makes that crazy more than making everything else crazy?
It’s really the most beautiful day outside… It has been so wonderful, the weather lately. Sure doesn’t feel like January, but it’s Houston. Ugh, I want a hammock; I’m determined to get one. I know I will get a place of my own, soon. I am praying about going ahead with this apartment with my brother, or waiting it out to get my own. It’s so hard for me to stay focused, and encouraged. I faceplant very swiftly. I confess that I always need to look forward to something. But I want to enjoy being productive as much as I enjoy being still. Too much time is wasted because I live like I’m watching television. I watch too much and involve myself too little. I stay neutral so much that I make myself invisible. I need a plan and I need it more often. On Friday night, Zeke was talking about how Jesus will have us working in the New Jerusalem. We aren’t going to be vegged out in front of our supposed “96 inch flat screens.” I don’t think I have even ever believed that; It’s ridiculous. I do wonder what He will have us do. Oh, I believe it will be enjoyable for us, for sure. So I feel inspired, responsible even, to be sure I am cheerfully and productively working for His Kingdom even now. Because, I want to, but I’m really not. Eek.
So what’s new for me? Well, I’m teaching my first piano lesson tomorrow night. Sarah is 8 years old. I was and kind of am nervous, but I feel so excited. I’m hoping it’s a beginning for me. I want to train up worship leaders. And I’m not gonna lie, I know it will cause me to get better. Teaching these kiddos to love Jesus is helping me draw closer to Him. I want more, and the Lord knows it. Only God can comprehend how I feel being given these opportunities to worship and sing, to teach these kids by putting scripture to music, and literally seeing my dreams come true in the place of prayer. How wrong I was to want them in any other place, in any place outside of where God dwells and is glorified. And in His wisdom, God has been waiting to grant them. And I couldn’t be more grateful!!
